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1998-07-22 00:00:00 - Knowing what you want is not the same as overanalyzing - (reina616@aol.com)


Kat said: I've heard the fastest way to doom a relationship is analysis of it. The same can apply to many things. I'd rather ride the rollercoaster, it makes for a better story. It also makes wherever you go, the place you are. If that >seems flaky (or not!), oh well - it's a Gemini thing. ----- You've heard??????? Haven't tested it out for yourself? What I do is decide what kind of man I want, as precisely as possible. Helps me recognize him when he shows up. During the relationship I try to be *in the moment* as much as possible. If something goes wrong, THEN I go into analytical overdrive, so I don't make the same mistake next time. Sometimes the mistake can be in not recognizing a potential problem. To wit. At the age of 20, I went out with a very hunky Jewish nightclub owner -- who had been a former boxer -- I was attracted to him. I wouldn't have dared go out with a man I wasn't attracted to. I wore a Mollie Parnis suit. Turned the Peter Pan collar up for a Mandarin look. I had learned my lessons in erotic power well from watching Arletty, Greta Garbo, Lauren Bacall, Rita Hayworth, et al. and am writing about this because my site gives lessons in erotic power and this is a major WARNING to my readers that you'd better know what you're doing before you start fooling around with power that can get you into real trouble if used heedlessly or foolishly. He was fascinated. Wanted to take me to the Copa. I wanted to go to HIS nightclub in Brooklyn. He never took women there. That's where I wanted to go. He got rid of his bodyguard, took me to his club and then to a huge housing complex in the middle of nowhere. No buses, no subway. I ended up date raped. Just as the foolish young woman who went up to Mike Tyson's hotel room. I was fooling around with more erotic power than I knew what to do with. The movies teach us to be sexy. They don't teach us how to be careful. My mistake? Going out with a man who had used his fists to get what he wanted out of life. It took me years to recover from this experience. Many years later, in Mallorca, a handsome Italian who was waiting for me to get my things together saw THE GODFATHER open on a table and asked me how I liked it. I liked it fine and was reading it because an actor I knew in New York was up for the role of Sonny. *I'll see what I can do.* Long pause. I ended the relationship as graciously as possible using the diplomatic approach of *nice doggy, nice doggy* until you get out of biting range. For some reason, (my Scorpio aura?) gangster types found me attractive. Consequently, I don't go where they hang out. The only time I've been to Vegas was for an astrology convention, and I didn't partake of the night life because I didn't have enough money. That's what I told my room mates. What I didn't say was that I'd have to have several million in mutual funds before I would spend a cent on Steve & Eydie. I loathe Vegas vulgarity. I have organized my life such that I haven't been near a gangster in decades. We lead parallel lives that never meet. Just a suggestion from a fellow Gemini/Sagittarian with Jupiter in Scorpio. <A HREF="http://www.geocities.com/Paris/Parc/5217">Letters to Nikita</A> furthering her erotic and intellectual education.

1998-07-22 00:00:00 - OFF TOPIC Re: Knowing what you want is not the same as overanalyzing - (Kat <kathe001@email.msn.com>)


Sorry all for the OT. Reina: Nope, remember? I like the rollercoaster. That's why I try *very* hard to take people on faith, expecting nothing (i.e., preconceived blueprints), and am usually pleasantly surprised as a result. Kat Reina 616 wrote in message <1998072218325800.OAA20343@ladder03.news.aol.com>... >Kat said: > >I've heard the fastest way to doom a relationship is analysis of it. The same >can apply to many things. I'd rather ride the rollercoaster, it makes for a >better story. It also makes wherever you go, the place you are. If that >>seems flaky (or not!), oh well - it's a Gemini thing. >----- >You've heard??????? Haven't tested it out for yourself? > >What I do is decide what kind of man I want, as precisely as possible. Helps >me recognize him when he shows up. > >During the relationship I try to be *in the moment* as much as possible. > >If something goes wrong, THEN I go into analytical overdrive, so I don't make >the same mistake next time. > >Sometimes the mistake can be in not recognizing a potential problem. To wit. At >the age of 20, I went out with a very hunky Jewish nightclub owner -- who had >been a former boxer -- I was attracted to him. I wouldn't have dared go out >with a man I wasn't attracted to. I wore a Mollie Parnis suit. Turned the Peter >Pan collar up for a Mandarin look. > > I had learned my lessons in erotic power well from watching Arletty, Greta >Garbo, Lauren Bacall, Rita Hayworth, et al. and am writing about this because >my site gives lessons in erotic power and this is a major WARNING to my readers > that you'd better know what you're doing before you start fooling around with >power that can get you into real trouble if used heedlessly or foolishly. > >He was fascinated. Wanted to take me to the Copa. I wanted to go to HIS >nightclub in Brooklyn. He never took women there. That's where I wanted to go. >He got rid of his bodyguard, took me to his club and then to a huge housing >complex in the middle of nowhere. No buses, no subway. I ended up date raped. >Just as the foolish young woman who went up to Mike Tyson's hotel room. I was >fooling around with more erotic power than I knew what to do with. The movies >teach us to be sexy. They don't teach us how to be careful. > >My mistake? Going out with a man who had used his fists to get what he wanted >out of life. It took me years to recover from this experience. > >Many years later, in Mallorca, a handsome Italian who was waiting for me to >get my things together saw THE GODFATHER open on a table and asked me how I >liked it. I liked it fine and was reading it because an actor I knew in New >York was up for the role of Sonny. *I'll see what I can do.* Long pause. I >ended the relationship as graciously as possible using the diplomatic approach >of *nice doggy, nice doggy* until you get out of biting range. > >For some reason, (my Scorpio aura?) gangster types found me attractive. >Consequently, I don't go where they hang out. The only time I've been to Vegas >was for an astrology convention, and I didn't partake of the night life because >I didn't have enough money. That's what I told my room mates. What I didn't say >was that I'd have to have several million in mutual funds before I would spend >a cent on Steve & Eydie. I loathe Vegas vulgarity. > >I have organized my life such that I haven't been near a gangster in decades. >We lead parallel lives that never meet. > >Just a suggestion from a fellow Gemini/Sagittarian with Jupiter in Scorpio. > ><A HREF="http://www.geocities.com/Paris/Parc/5217">Letters to Nikita</A> >furthering her erotic and intellectual education.

1998-07-23 00:00:00 - Re: OFF TOPIC Re: Knowing what you want is not the same as overanalyzing - (reina616@aol.com)


Kat said: I like the rollercoaster.That's why I try *very* hard to take people on faith, expecting nothing(i.e., preconceived blueprints), and am usually pleasantly surprised as a result. If it works for you fine. I analyze relationships that haven't worked, after the fact, because in the words of Edna St. Vincent Millay: *It's not one damned thing after another. It's the same damn thing over and over.*